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Even if that latter category sounds appealing to you, remember that people blithely (or desperately) looking for a squeeze between the sheets can put more earnest daters off.OKC may have a high member count, but a lot of women find its barrage of sex requests and outright abuse an instant red flag. One female friend complained to me that she got so many messages per day (most saying “Heyyyy”) she felt that she “was at the centre of a toad knot”.Thereafter, the more questions you answer, the more likelihood the OKC algorithm will find you a match.What this means is, with not much thought, you can fairly easily sculpt your profile to find, for example, a gay eugenics pipe smoker.The other reason all these people are on OKC is, of course, that the site is free to join. Well, yes, in my experience of online dating, free is very definitely bad.And it's here where you encounter the second major drawback. Free sites are packed full with spammers and scammers and people looking for casual sex.There are different levels of this pestery – few people get as many creepy messages as Asian women (documented here).
Mind you, it’s not all bad – there are plenty of lovely women on there, and the site has a huge success rate in matching partners.
It seems that the world's more extreme sexual daters have found safety in the OKC numbers game and gathered in one place to pester each other. When you sign up to the site, as well as drafting the normal essay about how great you are and uploading four out of focus photographs from that period in 2006 when you were hot, you answer a raft of multiple choice questions.
These range from the fairly ordinary (“Could you date a smoker?
The profusion of kinky folk can get fairly terrifying at times, especially if, like me, your sexual appetites are fairly tame.
One woman sent me an email with a five point list of things she wanted to do to me.