Can an extrovert dating an introvert high end speed dating nyc
For example, you may be tempted to compliment your introverted love interest on looking nice, but it can fall flat if your date doesn’t actually identify with a strong investment in appearance.
I’m not a shy or quiet person, but I do get energized by being alone.
In the interest of promoting harmony, here are some tips on how to effectively court and date an introvert. Just as nature abhors a vacuum, we abhor vacuous small talk. BTW, this is what we mean when we respond with, "Sorry, have plans already! Just because we need quiet time doesn't mean we expect you to do the same. Just don't try to force us when we don't want to, and don't make us feel bad about it. We need to know that we can be our natural introverted selves without worrying about hurting your feelings or being judged for who we are.
Because our energy is limited, we don't want to waste it on something that isn't meaningful to us — and spending any amount of time and energy on small talk is a waste of said time and energy. That "rule" about dating, where you're supposed to call after three days? A phone call is intrusive, it interrupts us and catches us off-guard, and it is often filled with unnecessary small talk. Look, we know our need for quiet time can be a bummer to everyone for whom life is a constant party. We already spend enough time feeling like we're disappointing everyone around us. Nothing will shut us down faster than hearing something like, "C'mon, what's your deal?
I’ve also come to recognize that these fundamental differences tend to contribute to our marital conflicts.
Obviously, this is not the case for every person in every marriage, but here are some things I have observed and learned about being an introvert married to an extrovert: It drives me nuts when he thinks through decisions out loud.
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It can be helpful for all parties to recognize that deep conversation (or, sometimes, all conversation) should be put on hold until the level of stimulation decreases. Respect our decision to abstain from additional stimulation.